Several years ago, a friend invited me to her bridal shower.  As we were going around sharing who we were, my friend introduced me as a poet and someone who “always has poetic words that inspire and nourish” her spirit.  I was a bit embarrassed being the center of attention as everyone turned toward me.  And then they asked if I had any words about marriage that I wanted to share.  (No pressure!)  I said, “Circle back to me.  I’ll write something.”  And, as poetry seems to do with me, I surrendered and this is what I wrote on the back of scrap paper and an envelope.

Saying Yes.
Again and Again.

I loved you
long before I ever met you.

Long before I ever knew
the contours
of your face,

before I ever wrapped my arms
around your waist;

before I ever knew
what made you
laugh or cry,
scared or feel alone.

I loved you long before I said

YES.

Yes
to your kisses
and comforting embrace

Yes
to snuggling with you
and making love with you

Yes
to spending the rest of my life
with you.

But what I am discovering lately
is this:

The funny thing about love
is that you have to
keep saying

YES.

Yes
to trash night and
cleaning the bathroom

Yes
to sharing a bank account
and a mortgage

Yes
to long labors
and sleepless nights

Yes
to unexpected losses
and missed opportunities

Yes
to being vulnerable
and choosing to join each other
when we’d rather jump ship.

We have to say yes –
to all of it –
the happy and ecstatic moments
as well as the sad and mournful moments.

We have to keep saying yes
year after year –
and sometimes
minute
by
minute!

We have to choose to say yes,
this moment,
this breath.

So on the day I stand
in front of our family and friends,
I’ll say yes to you –
in that moment,
with that breath,

and all the breaths
I am to have.

Lisa A. McCrohan, © 2010

This is what love is about – the everyday, mundane, ordinariness of our lives.  We have to keep saying “yes.”  It’s not something we say just once on our wedding day.  It’s an everyday-even-if-this-really-bites-and-I’m-angry-and-right kind of YES.  It’s a YES to choosing to turn toward each other.  It’s choosing to say YES to being vulnerable.

What would it be like to examine your commitment to your dear one?  What do you need to say “YES” to right now in this season in your life together?

Blessings,
Lisa

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