Brian and I are doing something new this summer around here at our house. We are calling it:
“Who’s Coming to Dinner?!”
Every week we are putting an open invitation out there to our friends and family to be spontaneous, try something new, and come for dinner one night of the week. One family may come or five might come.
Old friends, new friends, those close by or those far away. However they are (good mood, bad mood, a mess or totally on their game). Whatever food they have – PB&J or grilled steak. Friends are invited to come as they are with whatever mood, food, music, drink, aching heart, full heart they’ve got!
While our friends are used to us inviting them over for a playdate or a dinner date, “Who’s Coming to Dinner?!” thing is about adventure, spontaneity, community-building, challenging our “routine”, and opening our home to whoever may want to come for nourishing food and company. It’s about us extending our table rather than planning it out and deciding who we want to come over.
It’s about dropping the belief that everything has to be “perfect” (the house in order, a gourmet meal, kids and parents in great moods). We make whatever we have in the frig. People bring whatever they have in their frig. Some days that might mean hummus and tortillas, or rice and beans…or some yummy fresh fruit from our garden.
It’s about, for me, Lisa, bringing the spirit of the Barefoot Barn dream INTO OUR EVERYDAY LIVES right here, right now — not just when (someday?!) we have an actual barn and wide open spaces and a large front porch to sit on.
It’s about LIVING the Barefoot Barn dream right now – in our little house with no big front porch over looking a vast field — but instead a sliding backdoor that opens onto a deck in suburbia that over looks a vast field and playground, where we hear the magical sound of children from the neighborhood laughing and playing, and our children and guests eat home-made orange juice popcicles and run through the sprinkler in our small but RICH backyard — with my Salvadoran hammock underneath the deck and veggie garden growing.
It’s about not waiting. Not waiting until we have the space — space at the table for 20 people. Space in a huge field for a bonfire. Not waiting until we have a barn to dance in, play music in, and gather in. Not waiting to follow what delights our hearts.
It’s about honoring what delights our hearts in THIS very moment. The delights of being in community, being about nourishing ourselves and others, widening our circle of friends, extending our loving home to dear ones, building friendships, and embracing what IS right now. It’s about recognizing that our dreams are actually being fulfilled RIGHT NOW. Though they look a bit different than we imagined, our dreams are actually reality — right here in our little house.
It’s about creating magic and vastness and spaciousness and celebrating COMMUNITY RIGHT HERE in the space we have. It’s about improvising. No trees? No problem! We take all the blankets in the house, throw them over an old umbrella and make a “magical tree fort”. We make a look-out tower (your fort always needs a lookout tower!) on top of the small shed in our backyard that you have to climb up the AC unit to get to!
So last Sunday night was our first (very!) spontaneous invitation (we posted on FB giving our friends just three hours to be spontaneous and see about joining us). I was blown away by the response – on FB, texts, emails, and phone calls. Folks wanted to join, wanted to come. Most couldn’t make it but asked if we’d do it again! We said, OF COURSE! One of our neighbors came over and our kiddos were waiting at the door to show our friends their new “spy desks” that papa built for them. They played, ate some grilled zucchini and chicken Brian that had made, and it ended with hugs and kids ready for bath time.
There was a sense of liberation and deep contentment. We were bringing our dream alive right here, right now, in our little suburban house. Going to bed that night, Brian and I looked at each other: “When are we doing it again?!” we both asked!
And so, every week this summer. One day each week – or whenever we want to! “Who’s Coming to Dinner?!” Popsicle are chillin’, sprinkler is ready, and flashlights are ready for moon walks and ghost stories.
Who knows who will come?!
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Who knows how long any of us have? Seriously. We could die today. We could die in 50 years. Brian and I are not waiting to follow what delights our heart. We aren’t waiting to build and nourish community until we have a barn and field for bonfires. We aren’t waiting to extend our table and offer compassion and good times to dear ones. We are living a life of no regret. Living a life of bringing our dreams into our everyday lives RIGHT NOW.
What delights your heart? What dreams do you have? What are you waiting for? What are you putting off until “someday” when you have enough time and money and fewer responsibilities? What would it be like to START NOW? Start living from your heart and cultivating the life you want right here in your breath, in your heart, in your home, and in your community?
Blessings of spontaneity,
Lisa A. McCrohan
MA, LCSW-C, RYT
Compassion Coach
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Blessings,
great idea! and I hope you have as much meaningfulness as it sounds:)
It really has!!!! We just had our second dinner and it was just lovely. So many friends have responded on Facebook and in emails to me about this idea. Some want to start it in their house. I’m like “go for it!” Love, Lisa
what a beautiful idea! You are my inspiration, Lisa 🙂 Many blessings to you! xxx
Eline, YOUR words and work soooooo inspire ME. There is such an eloquent and elegant feel to your words and pictures. Such “grace”, Eline. Love, Lisa
You’re so kind, Lisa 🙂 Thank you xxx
Such a lovely lovely idea Lisa! The whole world needs to think like you do — ahhh – how amazing would that be? ~ I love this open dinner invitation — BYO everything – so much fun it will be!!! x Robyn with Love
Robyn, we are really loving it!!! At one of our dinners, someone showed up that we weren’t even expecting and it was so much fun! There has been a lot of feedback on this “who’s coming to dinner” fun summer thing and it is really encouraging me to be spontaneous and have fun and go with the flow. It is really bringing something delightful to this world — or our little corner of it! Love, Lisa
I love it Lisa!!!! What a wonderful idea !!!!!
Thank you, Cindy! We just had our second “who’s coming to dinner” nights and it was really lovely! We got to know some folks from my son’s school who we didn’t know too well before. I’m really loving this! Love, Lisa
What an awesome idea. I love it.
Brenda, it is going fabulously! It seems to really be encouraging this sense of lightness and spontaneity in folks…and in us. I really am excited to see who comes to dinner over the summer! We will just keep inviting folks and so far, it’s been a blast. Love, Lisa
Hi Lisa!
I love following your blog. And would love to have you write a guest post for Heal Now and Forever Be In Peace this summer. You can even refurbish an old post of yours. each is so beautiful! I am looking for a 300-500 word inspiring personal narrative. This can bring readers to both of us. I have a email listing of ~2200, a Twitter following of over 18K and FB of almost 8700. Let me know if you have something you can send me by June 30 and we can settle on a date to post! Thanks even for considering it!
Warmly, Jodi
Jodi Lobozzo Aman, LCSW-R
Find me on the web…
I blog here: Heal Now and Forever Be In Peace, and here: Anxiety-Schmanxiety Blog, share here: Twitter@JodiAman, inspire here: Facebook: Heal Now and Forever Be in Peace, counsel here: www.heal-here.com.
Get my free E-book: What Is UP In Your DOWN? Being Grateful in 7 Easy Steps.
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Jodi, Quick note — that would be LOOOOVELY! YES YES! Let me think about something I’d love to share. Love, Lisa
Oh this is a marvelous idea. I just love it love it love it. “It’s about not waiting.” What delights your heart. . . thank you for keeping me focused this Monday. And thanks for your lovely comments on my blog!
Oh David, you so got it! I needed to catch up on your blog and I was just so thrilled reading your post about your poetry being read by others. I could totally hear it in your voice that you were just so tickled and delighted. That makes my heart smile! And thanks about this post — I know – it IS a good idea! I love it! Maybe some day you all will come down from PA! 😉
You have brought me to tears, Lisa. The concept you are living here by opening your home, your table, your heart to whoever comes is so inspiring. I am a work in progress on shedding the “armor” of perfection and worry. To open my home as you have is challenging but liberating. My husband does exactly what you have described here. On a whim, he’ll say, let’s invite so and so and their families over after church. It took me awhile not to think … but the house … but the food … but the … Yet, every single time, people were thrilled to be invited and we all chipped into the meal.
I just love everything about YOU and what you write. I gotta admit, I am kind of jealous of your neighbors and friends. How I would love to come to dinner and your house! Thank you for sharing this on my Hands Free Revolution page today. I wish I had more time to keep up with my favorite blogs. Please share anytime. You are a gift.
Rachel, I am just now getting to comments (the kiddos are with Brian at dance class and this mama is taking a few hours to write!). Rachel, I had to share this when I saw you share the post you did on your FB page. Yes, so this is what we’ve been doing all summer. It’s really lovely. I mean, we always have invited folks over but it was always so “planned” and it was with all of our familiar friends. We decided to open it up to our “acquaintances” as well — to more deeply nourish our relationships. It’s really been lovely to see the response whenever we do put an invite out there for “who’s coming to dinner?” You are right on – every single time I’m like “Oh now, what if it’s not ‘perfect’?” I see how thrilled people are, like you say, to be in sweet company and to be nourished.
Our house is small but our home is very…happy. It’s soothing and nourishing.
I hear you about keeping up with our favorite blogs. We do what we can, right?
Oh and about “dropping the armor” — I’m about to write a post about juuuuust this!
Love to you, Rachel. You are going “big time”, girl. It’s your time to shine.
Love,
Lisa