Take Me
Take me, my Beloved.
Take my lips and breasts and hips.
Take me in to you, every cell of you.
My flesh, your flesh.
My strength, your strength.
My heart, your heart.
Take my embrace,
my soft kisses, my caresses,
my slow, rhythmical swirls.
Let my arms be the shawl that warms you.
Let my breath be the song that soothes you.
Your sorrows, my sorrows.
Your pain, my pain.
Your hopes, my hopes.
Take me, my Beloved.
Take all of me.
Me no more. You no more.
Our love-making, a holy offering.
Our bed, the altar
where your sufferings
are transformed.
Lisa McCrohan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We live in a “me! me!” time. This spills into our relationships. Our most intimate relationships can be places where we get lost, where we hurt, and where we feel hurt. We can demand that our beloveds meet our needs and make up for old wounds that were there long before we ever met. This is a true suffering many face.
But there is another way to love. A love where we offer ourselves in a way that is holy and whole. Where our beloved does the same. This is a love where “making love” is a daily “offering of self” and a “receiving of the other” — so much so that we become one. Not in some Hollywood, Jerry McGuire “you complete me” kind of way. But rather where our love making – in the bedroom, at the dinner table, in times of grieving, in times of joy, on trash night, when he talks too little and she talks too much, after an eight hour car ride with screaming kiddos in the backseat, in the quietness of laying next to each other — is Divine poetry.
We have much to learn about loving in such a way that there is a healthy “giving over of self,” true sacrifice, and total devotion.
Many folks want to know “HOW.” How do I cultivate such a love with my partner?
The most beautiful book I’ve ever read on relationships is a simple, “too easy” to read book by Thich Nhat Hanh called, True Love. His simple mindful ways of loving are waaaaay too easy to gloss over. But they are profound. Profoundly healing. Profoundly transformative.
Thich Nhat Hanh says we begin by BEING there. (It sounds super easy. But in our daily lives, how often are we really THERE with our beloved? Present. Mindful of our own reactions. Mindful of our beloved and what they are presenting to us in any given moment.)
We then say, “I see you.”
We SEE their suffering. We take it in. We breathe with it.
We say, “I see you. I see you are suffering. And that is why I am here.” We give presence. We give space.
With such presence, such tenderness, such willingness to SLOW DOWN and SEE the other person (and our own “stuff” and the situation), we become healing balm for each other.
My sincere hope is that each person who is called to be in an intimate relationship with another experiences such healing, holy Love.
** THANK YOU for sharing these posts with the dear ones in your life. I hope these words inspire you to live with more delight, compassion, and connection in your everyday lives.
Blessings,
What a beautiful poem! And the post (that you stayed up too late writing), too!
My husband and I wrote a book a long time ago along the lines of this post called Illuminating the Heart: Steps Toward a More Spiritual Marriage. It never sold well–I think we were just ahead of our time 🙂
Thanks for the important reminder that love is holy.
Barb, that’s a beautiful title for a book! I am a psychotherapist and though my specialty isn’t couples, I have seen plenty and worked with hundreds more individuals who have challenges in their relationships. There is such an “opportunity” in our most intimate relationships to “work out” our stuff – karmic stuff, early childhood stuff – but most often, like with many things, folks want quick fixes, we get stuck in being triggered and wanting the other person to change, and we stay on a very myopic, surface level of relating with others. We stay stressed out and rarely go deeeeeeep within and cultivate silence. I’m sounding quite negative here! But I have also seen it a FEW times when others reallllly do embrace a mindful, gentle, compassionate way of self-introspection and then are able to love more deeply and fully. Yes, maybe your hubby should try selling it now!!! Blessings, Barb. Lisa
Lisa, I’m so happy not only for the riches you had to share with us but the joy it gave you to do so. I like the posterboard of the arms and shawl excerpt above the poem. And before I got to the close of the poem, I did notice its “givingness:” your pain, my pain (not in reverse). Love your 2nd paragraph and your holy definition of love-making in the mundane. Please delete the following…I mean only to help: I hope the suggestions are ok! I know it’s not easy going back and doctoring something you wrote a long time ago but on the chance you agree (which I don’t think you will), I think that line will be stronger, cleaner, and more effective without the SOFT kisses. Just kisses. And “who is called to be in an intimate relationship”
perhaps “called into an intimate….”? Do let me know if I’ve stepped on toes. I won’t go there again. Just wanted to tighten and tuck, do justice to your enlightening thoughts, in the spirit of my Writing Process post “Save Spit.” I love the voice in your poem.
Love,
Diana
How beautiful to read this today. Just yesterday I had a keen awareness in my spirit that I was being asked to practice being totally present to my relationship with my life partner. I caught a glimpse into how often I relate to the relationship out of what I need, what I expect, what he is not doing, my disappointment over him not being who I want him to be, etc. I feel a call to move into a place of simply being present to the relationship without all the bulls**t. Your post eloquently spoke to this topic. Thanks again. Hugs, Brenda
Lisa, I realized you managed to be both maternal and sensual in the poem. What I just posted is the one I’d mentioned that I wrote in my head while sitting with my son over lunch, on the heels of the Bereft — just before you posted yours. It just struck me how you and I have been thinking alike.
Yikes, I was having technical problems and the new poem posted w/ typos!@! I hope you see it fixed now. So bummed. My DRAFTS page wouldn’t let me indent the 3rd line of every stanza. Saving, clicking preview or publishing would iron out the indent. I tried everything, even to import the indented version off notepads and blank document pages. How did you get your drafts page to shape your poem? Diana
Diana,
FIRST, THANK YOU! Maternal and sensual…soooo interesting you should use those two words to describe my poetry (and me!). I am deeply nourishing and nurturing my sensual self lately — over the last few years. Maybe it is because I’m about to turn 40. Something is shifting in me. I am embracing a deep sensuality within me.
I hear you about typos! It just shows we are human!
Ok — the draft page to “shape” my poem — do you mean to make it “centered”? There is an easy icon button to click at the top of the draft (in the bar above where you type). If you can’t find it, I’ll give you my email address and then my phone number and I can walk you through it.
So sweet of you, Lisa. On the less important matter first: no, that’s not what I meant and it’s okay now. It’s a “typo” I forced to get the effect of an indentation….I won’t bother going into it. I whited it out, hoping it wouldn’t show against the backdrop of my page. Anyways, done with. Secondly, that is just FASCINATING, Lisa! Wow, I totally got that from your poem! So exciting. =) Sorry if you’ve seen this already. The only reason I share it is your mention of age. You’ll understand when you open it. You’ve been supportive enough. Please: no obligation on a response of any sort. Just continuing this wonderful exchange, ping-ponging off each other:
https://aholisticjourney.wordpress.com/2013/02/16/lessons-from-my-30s/